Main | Why do I choose to be fat? »


Steve Troutman

I like your post. You have a good sense of humor. You are a good writer too. You shouldn't beat yourself up so bad though. It isn't you that is the problem, it's our society.

I like the twilite Zone. On the 4th of July they have a twilite zone marathon and I'm there. There's this one episode about the future. There is this drop dead gorgeous blond and she thinks she's ugly because everybody else has misshapen pig looking faces and hers is different.

The bottom line is life is too short to beat yourself up. You are who you are. If everybody in the world was fat, and you were thin, you'd be in the same mess you are now right? What's the difference? What you think about yourself. That's it. You were put on this earth because you have a special talent. A gift that no one else has. Use your gift to help others. Don't worry about being fat.

There have been a lot of fat people who did great things for the world. John Candy, Mama Cass, Chris Farley, John Valucia, The singer in blues traveler band, The fat guy from Laurel and Hardy, Curley from the 3 stooges, Costello,(Who's on first?)

Be yourself. People will respect you more. If you don't like the way you look in your clothes and they don't fit, wear bigger clothes.

That's it for me.

Take Care,


I am thirteen years old. I weigh 180... i am 5'6
I totally hate myself. I hate how when i go to visit family and they say look how big you are. or imply other things saying im fat. I really hate it.
I just cant stop eating...

Kristi Cloud

IM 39 IN okc Like Everyone else I gained at least sixty pounds in a year because I was on ice and meth and had starved myself for years.Trying to fell good for once in my life I have been diagnosed with all kinds of stuff bi-polar major manic deppresive just plain old deppresion.I weigh 184 right now and Im 5-3 to fat plus In 2007 I had the amputation (bk)below the knee it was the best desicion but I had four years of hiding so they wouldnt Im not married Im singal and lonely i dont plan on a fat women with one leg ever being wanted as a wife women with one leg and issues before the accident call me ill be your friend!!


hey im addicted to this website i have read every post and i too hate being fat . i have beeen fat my whole life and my heaviest have been 375lbs. im a male 36 yrs and for the last yr and a half have been going to the gym and eating a relatively low carb diet. im now 285lbs . i still go to the gym i love it now but still over weight . im 6.1 feet. i still look fat even though i lost almost a 100 lbs . i was so confident when i was over weight . didnt give a rats ass what people thought of me. now im so insecure . people tell me that i look good now like normal people i wish i could see it . i hate my body but gonna keep working hard at it. i have a friend that i love and she says that we cant b for many reasons 1 is i have 2 kids . she is also really young being only 23yrs . we once had a fight and broke up for a few and she told one of her friends that im a fat piece of shit. that didnt help our relationship. i tried breaking it off with her but its so hard and she has a gym body. im a loser i know but theres always that 1 person that you are always weak for and she is mine. still workin out at the GYM WISH ME LUCK !!!

Leonardo Storti

I am fat too and also hate myself for it, in fact probably much much much fatter than the majority of you, last time I weighed myself I weighed like, 270 pounds. I am now 21 and about to turn 22 in may 17(which is close by). I probably weigh alot more than that now, my pants size is now 44 and it's starting to push to 45. But I have been doing something about it, I have been walking for an hour or 30 to 45 minutes a day, and on last monday I started on my second week, I also combined it with a diet which is almost a living hell since I have to eat the poisonous vegetables, not to mention my house is full of the most delicous tempting junk foods.

But I am learning to resist, so far I have recieved several complements from my families and relatives that they noticed quite a change in the looks of my body, which I believe is bull****. But I kind of like it, it is at least giving me some confidence to keep at it, because when they say that, it feels like I was given a treat for it...I don't know I guess it sounds like music to my ears.

anyways that was my comment on this

Cheri M.

I am 60 & have had weight issues for 50 of those years. In high school I had prescription amphetamines & I actually got to 110 lbs!..for about 3 months & that was due my basically Not eating. Who can live like that. Everytime I lose weight and then it all piles back on plus 10 more I feel like an utter failure at life. People look at you like a failure. Every day of the last 50 years has been spent agonizing over food choices - obsesively - as the 1st writer said -Who would chose to hate themselves everyday. I met a wonderful man from my past who (suprisingly) loves me and wants to marry me..BUT there is a caveat: He wants me to get to 125 lbs. So here I am everyday trying so hard to put good things in my mouth & not losing & then eating chocolate to feel better & hating myself for even thinking I could get within 50 pounds that 125 lbs. How long can you hate yourself & your body before you don't care if you exist..& would anybody even notice.


I am a wopping 242 pounds and 5"11. I have been bigger then most people my age and have always looked older. I also developed much quicker then most poeple my age.

I have been the correct BMI 3 times in my life. Once when I was 16 and almost anorexic (these were the worst days of my life). Once when I was 22 and was training for the army (the most healthiest wieght loss ever) and once when I just lost weight but again very unhealthy.

It seems as though the only way I lose weight is when I am unhappy.

I am now the heaviest that I have ever been, in fact it is getting to the point now where my feet are getting sore, I have an 8 month old baby boy and it getting hard to be seated while i console him, i cant get up without hoisting myself up with my own arms, I sleep uncomfortably and need make two attempts at rolling over.

I have an amazing husband but I know it is only a matter of time before he opts out as our sex life has gone down the drain.

I try and motivate myself every single nigh, I say to myself that "tommorow it starts". It gets to noon and I start eating, by the time I get home, i seem to ravish the cupbaords.

I have read many times, many many times that i should reduce my meals to small portions, but alas, I am not convinced that this is the answer.

I know what the problem is, I do, i know it is just a matter of waking up early, riding the bicycle for 20 minutes and cutting out on carbs, but alas, I can not get myself to stick to it.

When I do go to the shopping mall and i see women older then myself with stretched skirts and bloated and miscouloured ankles, i say to myself omg that could be me if I am not careful, yet I can not make the change. I can not get myself to commit.

Everything else in my life is perfect, as mentioned an amazing baby boy, an amazing husband, although the sex part of it doesnt quite fit the picture, a good job with a substantial pay check, a great house and the list is endless, its just the one thing that I can not manage or change, it is the one thing that makes me feel that something lacks due to my weight.

Everytime I eat the treat, I tell myself, oh you have to lose weight, every time i walk in the street, I say to myself "maby your not looking so bad, but 242 pounds is HUGE, so dont even think your sexy". I constantly compare myself.

I really dont know what to do anymore, I am my own worst enemy.


okay so ive never blogged b4 but i really do hate being fat ive been fat since age 7 thanks to my step mom. but ever since ive gotten fat my own mom told me i was a fat ugly blob. and no guy would look at me the way they look at other girls. and i dont really have a normal body i can wear a medium in adult shirts or a large to a xlarge in teen clothes but i have to go to certain stores to find pants. i wear a 18 to 20 in pants and my legs are so ugly. i just hate it and my mom isnt helping. and right now i have a boyfriend and we've been dating for over a year but ive seen him look at other girls and they're all really skinny and pretty. and sometimes i think the only reason he dates me is bc no one else wants to date him. hes not ugly hes skinny tall and muscular but he tells me im perfect the way i am but its so hard to belive him when my mom wont even look at me and tell me that im part pretty. and sometimes people can just be so mean to me and it just makes me hate my self more.

Kathy Simms

So I stumbled on this site by typing I hate fat in google. I don't know how many of you are out there that are like me, but I have a daily preoccupation with fat, and my aversion to fat. I am constantly evaluating everything that I put into my body and over think rather than enjoy. I am not anorexic or bulimic, but I feel that I have an eating disorder of sorts. For those of you who have self diagnosed as overweight, I am not overweight. I am not underweight either. I am 36 years old, 5'7" and weigh 130, but I think I have body dismorphia. I don't see what others see and am very critical of myself, and of others. I don't know how to NOT be preoccupied by all of this but feel that it consumes me on a daily basis and sets the tone for my mood and how I am portrayed to others, and I don't know any how to go about my life any differently.....


I wish there was a whole forum under this topic!!!!

I googled "I hate myself for being fat" and here I am!

Let me state right off that I WISH I was like some of these women who are proud and happy and love themselves even though they are really big. More power to them! However the reality is that is NOT me. I have not and I will not ever like myself when I am fat. I too have the most vicious self-hatred around this issue.

I'm 5' 8 1/2 and I just got weighed at the doctor's at 208. Which is not huge--I've been bigger (my highest was 240 I think) but it is still technically obese. I hide it very well and I can look decent in clothes, but just like so many people I can't STAND looking at myself in the mirror, esp. after a shower and esp. at my face.

I wouldn't mind being fat if it didn't make me look ugly. My face is nice, it's pretty, and when I am thin (thinnest was 140) I have no problem attracting men. But starting with about 160, that attention drops off. The weight goes to my face and forget it, I feel really really ugly and gross and I can't stand it.

Well, I have been in denial about these 50 extra pounds for many years. But now has come the time when I want to date. I am amazed that so many women on here talk about how much they hate themselves for being fat, and yet then say they have a fiancee or a husband!!! That is totally shocking to me. For me, there is no way in hell I can be with a guy when I feel like this, and so I just avoid the whole sex/relationship thing completely.

But I really really want to date and have sex! I really do, and so that means I HAVE to start confronting this issue. I can't do the online dating thing because I can't take a picture of myself without wanting to throw up. I HATE THIS. I cannot stand it.

I made my friend take a bunch of pics of my face last week. She said they came out beautifully and that I looked great. But I refused to even open up the email. It's like that email and those pics contained ALL of my fear and self-loathing and all the things I was denying. I absolutely could not do it.

But, I finally made myself, and I am glad I did. I confronted the monster! And I think I may have turned a corner. Just being able to do that--to look squarely at myself and not run away. In fact, what I did was print out the best pic (where I still look hideous), wrote the date and my weight next to it and taped it up on my kitchen wall.

Just doing even this little bit--looking at my pic without looking away--has actually really helped me. I MADE myself note what was good and what I liked, and what I hated and didn't like. I like my eyes, I like my hair. I am NOT the totally hideous freak I feel in my mind, I am just too fat. There's a difference. I really tried to use this photo to make my body-imagge issues more practical and realistic. You know those out of control feelings of self-hatred like you are the most loathsome ugly disgusting thing on the planet. Well, I found looking at my pic helped me tame some of those feelings. Instead of dealing with totally crazy feelings and emotions, I at least have something real to deal with and look at. And you know what? The next step is photographing myself naked. Yep, I'm going to do it.

I am going to go back on WW, which has always worked for me until I just stop it, and I am going to document my weight loss. I am going to take tons of pictures of myself and post them one by one on my kitchen wall by date and weight. I am going to LOOK at myself and not give in to these hysterical fears.

Well I just thought I'd share.

Thanks for this site and good luck to everyone.


Oh my gosh! I am so happy that I found this and yet still irritated just the same. I look disgusting naked. In clothes not so bad, I am 28 with 2 kids, 5'9 and am a huge 230. People say that I don't look as big as I am but in my eyes, I am bigger. The fat rolls, the back fat, the unflattering way my jeans fit in "that" area no matter the size of them jeans. Ugh... hate it... I have tried so many things, nothing has ever worked. I don't even eat that bad. I eat chicken and fish never fried, no white bread or pastas, no sugary drinks though I soooo miss my sweet tea and I walk every chance I get. With a 4 and 5 year old it is a little hard to go to the gym. Ugh, I sound and feel so lazy.


im not even going to lie i just typed in i FREAKIN HATE BEING FAT and yur site came up
and low and behold i got sucked into reading it like no other mut !
im young and im not like obeses or what not
i just feeeeelllll so fat and UHHGGG i wish i was skinny i think i am having trouble with annorexia and i dont want that either but i just want to feel beautiful i mean i knoow how that sounds but when i look in the mirror i just want to cry because of how fat i am
its so annoying
the thunder thighs
the belley
the marks
the jiggles
i LOVE running but when i get out of it or cant its hard i know
and i find myslf wants these quick fixes and i feel like i cant talk to ANYONE about it becausue no one takes me seriouslys or understand how big of a problem i think i am eitherir having or developeing its so anooying how everyone lafs when i say im fat because I AM and they dont think i am uhhggg!! and every person i see if freakin skinny it seems like sometimes and i envu their body i feel like
i am like a healthy eater but when i do one wrong thing I JUST GO OFF THE DEEP END AND I HATE THAT ! i hate feeling like i have to eat nothing or everything like i have to be a twig or a LOG i just hate this feeling and i know i shuld givein to it but sometimes i do because its so overwhelming how much it consumes my mind and makes me feel less confident and like i dont want people to touch me because i am so self consioiuc!! I JUST DONT KNOW !! i needed to just all that out on here because i dont know who eles is gonna listen hell i dont even know if u are
but if u are yur not alone

Helper Tyo

IF your not fat and happy
become hellbent on exercising and eating right. Being overweight can be a factor of stress, anxiety, health disorders, or just being lazy. Get that crap out of your cycle and change your life.

Well, I am 55 years old and have been fat all my life, too. I also stumbled on this website by typing hate being fat. I can remember my dad saying to me if you loose some weight I'll buy you a whole new wardrobe. Well, of course it never happened because he always liked my brother better so he got all the attention. I remember when I was little my mother would never let me have seconds but my brother would get as much as he wanted - I was told that was all I needed because I was just a girl. So, when I got older I just started stuffing and eating everything I could get my hands on. I am over 200 pounds now, and hate my 5 foot 2 inch self. I will never be thin, and the thing that hurts the most is my husband and I stopped having sex over 5 years ago. His excuse is we need to loose some weight first (he is 6 foot and weighs almost 300 pounds). So, thanks for reading my hateful story!!


I'm 16 and I've been fat all my life...
I honestly find the courage and maturity every day to have the confidence to think that what i am is more important than how i look.
But it hurts a lot if you are constantly reminded that you are not.
I hear what everyone here has to say.
I've been there, still there actually.
I know how hard it is to just walk out of home or go shopping...
I know how much like a pile of crap you feel when the shopkeeper is a cute guy, measuring your waist to say "I'm so sorry, we don't have your size, but i can stitch it separately for you"
I know how horrible you feel when u repeat the same jeans again and again, hoping that amongst the million you have in your closet, these-the ones which fit you best, make up for it and make look like any other normal 16 year old.
I hate how others think it's lack of will power that keeps us fat...
I hate how just a little more comfort food reap such complicated consequences...
I hate the pigmentation i have to cover up.
I hate not getting my periods regularly.
I hate giving up eating well.
I hate how pathetic i feel with just a glance i get from the many onlookers i have each time i step out in the public.
I hate the stretch marks i have...
I hate having a body like this when i see how much more pretty my classmates look with the same clothes.
I hate wasting my true beauty with all this shitty flab.
I hate having to torture my body.
I hate having to listen to my dad's friends suggest that i better stop eating much or that i should start exercising.
I hate myself when i feel tired of walking on the treadmill for just 15 mins.
I hate i way i look especially when i sit down.
I hate being an Extra Large size in every damn thing i wear.
And most of all, i hate that i hate myself.

Thank you all for being truthful.
Helped me a lot.
PS: i found this site when i typed " hate being fat " as well .

-Raksha ( From India, Bangalore )


Im 20 years old 6ft 1 inch tall and im 250 lbs not only am i fat but i have man boobs its the worst thing in the world and i wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Ive gone to the gym and lost weight but never the boobs. Its the most emasculating thing in the world. I wear clothes to hide it and for the most part people dont notice. I wish there was something i could do but i feel like ive exhausted all of my options. I just stumbled across this sight read some of the posts and thought id post something of my own.


One step at a time, we get to our destination... whatever it maybe in life--that is just how it works.


It's amazing many people there are in this world that feel the exact same way i do. GOD I HATE BEING FAT. it feels awful specially when you have a bunch of thin friends. I hate the idea of being the fat one in the group and it discusts me to know that i'll probably never lose the weight. I am at a point in my life where i seriously just want to give up cuz i dont see a silver lining to this weight struggle. I am 17 and already my lifes over. I know u can all imagine how painful it is to c all ur friends and every1 around you talk about clothing, boyfriends and things like that knowing that you really cant join that conversation. It annoys me so much that i look this way but i dont see how i can b blamed for it since i was fat my WHOLE life. its not as simple as stop eating and ull b thin. ppl just dont get it and it pisses me off. Im so tire of having to look for clothes that hide my lumps and rolls. i wish i could just go into a store and buy the cute things i c knowing that they would fit me. I JUST HATE MY BODY. i wish to god losing weight was as easy as ppl think it is. too bad i guess.


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i have always been a confident person. i think i'm beautiful, so do many other people. but i'm fat. i don't give a damn that i have a pretty face. i wont ever be happy until i weigh what i should.

i'm a dancer. and i'm damn good. i could be a dancer for the rest of my life, make a living off of it and make a career out of it. i love to dance and dancing for the rest of my life would make me happier then anything in the world. but i can't. because dancers arent fat. dancers need to be pleasing to the eye or else no one wants to watch them.

last year (my senior year of high school) i lost 20 pounds. it was the best year of my life because i knew that i looked good. that guys wanted me...and not just guys who liked their girls "thick." i don't know what to do. i looked great in my prom dress and didnt stand out as the "fat girl" in the dance concert. but once that was all over i had no more motivation.

i gained the 20 pounds back in a matter of months, and am still gaining more.

I don't think of myself as a fat girl. is that weird? inside my head i'm a skinny girl. but then i feel how tight the waistband of my pants is or i see the almost double chin when i walk past my reflection and i remember that i'm not skinny. that i'm fat.

i am addicted to food. i know EXACTLY what i have to do to lose the weight but i just cant do it. example: this weekend all my friends at school as well as my roommate went home, so i'm here alone. it reminded me how i only have 4 friends here at school, and that i don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend or even a best friend to hang out with or talk to about how lonely i feel. so today, i ate a ridiculous amount. right now i feel like i'm going to vomit and i cannot even describe how much food i ate to make me feel this way. why do i do this? why cant i stop?

i am disgusted with myself. i hate how i feel. i hate how i do this to myself.


It does suck being fat.
I'm 15 years old and i'm about 5'3 and 198 pounds and i'm in-love with my best friend, I cry over how his friend who he likes has a perfect figure and is really pretty, I wish i was like that too.. People tell me i'm pretty but i don't think i am personally. It's hard to lose weight in a family who say for you to go on a diet then feed you junk food every night.
but, never give up hope. We'll get there if we're motivated enough..


Yeah it just occured to me I don't even look decent anymore. I look in the mirror and I see this huge apple of a stomach/lovehandles. I can't even wear heels (my favorite shoes) and look good. Literally, I hate my life.

I'm trying to change though. I started my diet today and am going to start the Wii fit tonight. Tomorrow, I'll continue again. *sigh*. Another nine months to go until this is over. Someone please shoot me.


i know exactly how you feel :( the worst thing is it makes you feel down all the is so hard to lose it after so long


I'm really glad to know that there's someone else who share similar feelings. Whenever I'm about to go out with my friends, I need to stick to my really small collection of extremely baggy t-shirts to not make a shape out of my hideous manboobs. I really really hate my body. I spend all my school holidays on strenous exercise yet still my weight doesn't budge from around the 95 ~ 100 kilograms mark. Ugh.


Hey FB

I'm not really fat, but I used to be a bit on the plump side a few years ago. One day, I decided to go for a jog, maybe because I was tired of being inactive. It was horrible, I stopped a few times along the way, and I only managed to complete about 2km, but I felt really good about myself. Since then, I exercise about twice a week, be it swimming or jogging.

I'm perfectly happy with my weight right now. I'm not a size 0, but it doesn't bother me. I don't diet, I pretty much eat what I like. One rule of thumb that I have is to never eat till I'm really stuffed, it gives you a horrid bloated sort of feeling. One piece of advice that I've received is to eat till you're about 3/4 full, as your brain doesn't register how full you are till much later.

Don't be so hard on yourself! When you feel down, call a close friend. Go for a makeover with your friends. Go on a shopping trip. Get your nails done. Sit in a bubble bath with a good book. Watch a feel-good show like Geok's How to Look Good Naked. You're a wonderful person, and you don't have to be a size 0 to enjoy life. Once you stop obsessing about your weight and start to enjoy life, you'll feel a lot happier. :)


I typed in "I hate being fat" and came accross this site like others. I too feel fed up tired and bloated. I have joined slimming clubs time after time lost weight put it back on. I have joined recently but have not got off the starting block. Dreading xmas as i already have the images of fattie in dress if i eventually find one that fits and looks half decent. Not sure what to do about it. I want to exercise but hate it and am too tired.

What i am determined about is to loose this awful feeling of depression, low self esteem and lifelessness that i have and maybe i might feel like snuggling up the hubby after ages of pushing him away.

What a sad person i am. Well new years drinks raise a toast to hopefully a new start and a step in the right direction to finally finding the old me that was and not the me that is. Good luck to all x.

Who cares...

Here's my journal post from the other day. It sums up how I feel and of course like a lot of you I found this post by typing "I hate being so fat" into the search engine. I'm 23 years old 5'3 and 230 pounds. Unlike a lot of you I didn't get fat when I got pregnant or had a kid. I'm fat because I have no self control. I hate every minute of it. I just got hired at Macy's and had to look at a bunch of fashion stuff. Man I wish I looked good enough to even consider wearing any of that stuff.

Here's my journal entry...
"... hello my obese friend. Enjoying your newly earned weight? How did it feel in those tight pants today? good? Could you imagine your fat butt swaying as you wrote on the board? I bet teh kids noticed. Are you every going to change? Don't you want your body to be a temple for God? Don't you want to get married? Don't you ever want to have kids? Don't you want to be a good example for others? Don't you want to wear a million things and do a million things?

Why do you drink your arsenic and eat your diabetes all day? You're like a drunk or a smoker killing yourself with your selfish habit and offending and disgusting all those around you. You'll die for your crime. You'll continue to grow until you are so embittered in yourself that you hide form the world and die a fat disgusting unhealthy pig. And all they will remember is you and all you will see is the fat the hides the real you.

The you that wants to run and play. THe you that wants to ski, rock climb, surf, hike, run, skydive and so much more. You want an adventurous man, but why would he want a woman too fat to go hiking?

I'm not talking anorexic or thin. Just flipping healthy. Happy well adjusted and healthy!

You weigh a disgusting 220 pounds or so. Woop de doo that you just lost some weight. Lose 90 more and keep it off.

Then you can look in the mirror and smile. Run and have fun. Take the stairs and be invigorated. Approach a man confidently. Walk into a room and not be terrified if people are looking at you. Go swimming and not be afraid of people looking at you."

I ended it with some encouragment for myself and rash promises. So what. Nothing came of it. I gained more weight. I hate my life and wish I could just crawl in a hole where I could be all alone. Forever.


I may not weight as much as some of you but compared to what I used to be, it kills me how fat I am. I used to be 130 and now I'm 160. I know, your thinking "what the hell is this girl complaining about" but 30lbs on a short (5'5") 22 year old shows up a lot. I miss my closet or clothes and my beautiful shoes. My boobs are so big and heavy now it hurts my back. I have no balance anymore and can't wear my shoes. I don't fit into a single thing in my closet...seriously...NOTHING. I'm surprised I can fit my underwear over my ass. None-the-less, I hate being fat! I don't feel like my self anymore. I'm depressed...I am ssooo not happy and I know that if I lost the weight I would be the happiest person alive. Even when I was 130, I still have those love handles but when I look at my old pictures now, I would give anything to look like that again and have smaller boobs. Only that my chocolate addiction has taken over me. Not to mention I don't' like veggies or sea food. If I liked these foods it would make losing weight SO easy! Its all about proportions, exercise and healthy food. That's all it simple. You just have to stick through it. I hate being fat ssoo much. I hate when you put on a shirt, even a loose one and it still looks like I'm pregnant...when I'm NOT! Its ssoo embarrassing! I would rather be skinny and have no boobs than to be fat and have big boobs. (When your skiny and have no boobs, you can always get a boob job...not so easy when your the other way around!)Amen to the first blog by the owner of this site. I also just stumbled upon it. I always wondered if there was a fat blog out there I can spill my heart out to. I feel so alone with this sometimes. My hubby has gained weight too but he is a guy and doesn't understand me. Well, he says he does lol but that just doesn't seem to be enough for me. Thank you!

Do It!

"Get on a fucking tredmill...and Stop Bitching"


wow drake u get around i saw u post a similar comment on bigliquid7's youtube video about a fat kid who wrote a poem about how hard life is bein fat. You need a better life than to troll on peoples problems.

being Beautifull doesnt come with a stigma... so for some of the skinnies out there askin themselves "wtf these fatties bitchin about!?"

u dont know what it feels like

and even if u are empathetic enough to understand some of the hardships fat people go through... you do it momentarily, you think about it once at that moment, divulge some diminutive inexperienced lesson about losing weight and so on.. and move on... for the fat person they are fat everyday... night

when they look at that cute guy/girl...theyre fat

when they want to dance or put on somthin more revealing....theyre fat

being fat affects alot of your life ...ALL THE TIME!...u make a comment about a fat person, laugh it up...leave and forget about it...

that persons meets several people like you in a day, and they cant walk away from it...cuz sometimes it might be they own friends/co-workers/family.

So i am fat, again. not by my own choosing THIS time...but because i tore a ACL/MCL and refused to get surgery, so i was on my butt for almost 2 years...

it was plenty of time to grow... and not as a person on the inside hah..

Anyhow, i was 5'8 male 365lbs @ 23years...but due to the afformentioned injury balooned up a bit to 245lbs @ 26yeaars

on my first diet i lost alot of weight from 365lbs to ...180lbs in less than 2years...sounds pretty crazy...well it was.. my diet was really hard, and not very nutritious... only reason i got myself on it was because of two things, first i hit rock bottom, i was sick and tired of being a 3rd class citizen, and second because of a girl i fell in love with, still didnt get, but thats beside the point....
luv can make you do crazy things, so can rock bottom

so now that ive lost weight once im plannin on doing it again. only this time i know more about the necessary nutrition and exercises...i like doing...well not 'like'...but 'tolerate more'

I noticed if u live with fat people its damn near impossible to lose weight without outside influence or extremely! strong willpower!

If those people are not on the same page as you, they will work as an obstacle against you not a support line... If you have some of the afformentioned willpower however, you can actually motivate them by losing weight, when they see you losing they will want to as well.

I recently started a diet with exercise... this time around im not starving myself with just 2 cans of tuna 3 slices of bread. I recently tried some products from Herbalife,
although i always tried eating healthy and never thought id take supplaments, this company has some great products though, they dont focus on dieting but alot of their products you lose weight as a side-effect..

Basically i just got their basic meal replacement and protein, im sure their other products are good but for the purposes of this replaces 2 meals for me and includes proper nutrition.

i have one normal meal... i choose to replace breakfast and dinner so i eat a normal meal at normal i mean nothin ultra light like salad and v8 but a good normal full meal...potatoes, chicken, salad....yumm! potatoes!! lol u can tell i love carbs haha

Plus im actually saving money with them, since i dont buy food for dinner/breakfast anymore...and one jar of protein and meal rplacement costs about 80$...can u buy nutritous food for 2weeks for 80$? didnt think so.

I urge you guys/gals to take a glancing, passing look at their products... i know the last paragraph sounds like a sales pitch... but bein a victim of a horrible diet i myself induced, i really wasnt lookin forward to eating more tuna and bread on my second time tryin to loose weight lol

2 years of that crap and i have all the doses of mercury i need for life lol

The problem i had is finding the right food for a diet, i am lazy, not having to cook is a bit more simple than cooking healthy and spending so much cash on organic/healthy foods... its soo hard to get all the nutrition u need without ingesting over 2000+ calories... and those calories come from really crappy foods you have to eat large amounts of to get the proper nutrition. .
..this is another reason there are lots of degenerative diseases out there... american fast food is nutritionaly worse than food served by UN to third world countries... think about that!

the foods we eat today are just crap, thats a huge culprit in todays obesity rates (im sure u all know)

oh btw herbalife doesnt have stores u can go and buy. You can however go to their website where you can up and they will send you a rep-coach to your house to help you...i suggest you take it slow, just get their basic core package they have...if you end up liking their products go nuts.

any questions about my current diet and goals, and the family/friends i have to step on to get there lol ...feel free to ask

Stupid ass comments are also welcome,

[email protected]


Hi, I am 24 5'4" and I weigh 178 pounds. I am used to weighing 135 150 at the most. But since I had my son The weight continues to pile on. I work out every day I try to eat less. But fo rsome reason at night it seems like I can not control it. I eat and then I take a laxitive or I make myself puke to feel better. I just ogt married a few months ago I shed 15 pounds. My husband walked in the room and looked at me in away that made me feel like the only woman in the world. Well since I have been back in the USA I have manage to gain ten of the 15 back. Today my husband looked at me in discuss. As if he was seeing a face he was no longer interested in. I want to starv myself like the models do. It would be my luck that I would only gain more weight LOL! Man I hate being Fat. I wish I could be another me a skinnier me.


I have an eating problem too. I used to be very fat, and I don't care how much weight it is, I know how it feels to feel unloved by yourself. I am still working on it. But, I never judged anyone if they were fat. I cannot hate any of you, or anyone just because they are fat. I feel bad because I know how it feels to be trapped and out of breath. I had to come here tonight because I am going back to my addiction, to the thing that is an easy, intoxicating substitute for my feeling that I am not perfect. Strange, when people at work compliment me on doing a good job, I don't feel like eating much at all. Some of you are biologically fat, some of you use food, just like me as a substitute for something else. I just regained 16 lbs in a matter of three weeks. Yes, my intellect was going overboard ignoring the fact that I am a big nervous baby on the inside looking for feel goodi-ness. Well, at this point I am tired of abusing myself. I despise people who despise me or you for being fat without even knowing them. I used to not get around fat people because the next thing I know, I am overeating and getting fatter. But that is a cop-out. I am glad that I went through this phase, because I know how it started. I had lost 34 pounds, was looking good and confident, when the girls at work started in on me, for no other apparent reason. Trying not to be a target, I caved in and begin to purposefully become less attractive. The same thing I did to hide under 40 lbs of fat. If I stayed in the background, I would be safe. BS. When I overeat, I feel the same way I did when my mother baked home made cookies. I have to find another "healthy" way to feel better until I truly integrate into myself, that I am ok. Compared to a hollywood actress, I am fat. See, everyone has their hate point. But, I don't want to stay there. I give all of you who want it, a big warm hug.

SS Minnow

Thanks to Tara Banks for being a supporter of 'normal' sized women, size 14...and then buckling to society's pressure and losing weight to bring herself to a size 8. So much for a celebrity supporter.


life is so bad and harsh for fat girls :( u cant be happy with your self and feel happy . its getting crazy day after day. everyone makes fun of fat people why is that :S i have tryed each and single diet :S i hate my self and i hate my body. i really need help :( i feel like killing my self :S i wanna feel pretty and wear everything i want :(

SS Minnow

So tired of being fat. So depressed because I can't seem to stop shoving food into my mouth. Sometimes, when I'm done eating, I will sit down and it hits me how much I've actually just eaten. Last night after dinner, which I ate alot hour later, I eat the leftovers and then a jelly sandwich. What the hell is wrong with me?! Why can't I just eat when I'm hungry.

I had gone to my DR...she put me on anti-depressants...ran my ass off on my treadmill for 2 wks...4 miles a day. Lost nothing...then she tells me...well, some antidepressants make you gain weight. WTF? Does this sound like a good idea to anyone?!

I just want to be the size 12 I was 2 yrs ago. Funny...when I WAS that size 12, I thought I was fat and hated myself then too. I just want to be be happy being not be ashamed for my husband to see me naked or to feel my rolls when we are being intimate. I feel his hands move away when he feels them. Don't know if it's because he's grossed out or if he's afraid I might get upset that his hands are there.

God give me strength...or take me home. Tired of all the pain.


okayy, so i hate being fat! and I am. Im 18, 235 pounds (give or take) and im about 5'6. I was feeling really down on myself and typed in "I hate being fat" and this came up, so i started reading. Everyones sad entries made me realize that i dont want to be depressed, and despite being fat and occasionally getting made fun of i have a great life. i have plenty of friends, an AMAZINGGG boyfriend, my mom, brother and other family members who adore me ( for some reason i have yet to discover.) I always say things like " if i were skinny i would have more friends" and " if i were skinny i could..." ect. i blame everythign on my weight. and yes some things are affected by it, but not everything. Im actually kinda pretty when i wanna be. i have pretty blonde hair, and wicked green eyes. Yes i still want to be skinny, but i dont want to be desperate. thanks everyone, you helped me realize something


Just posted a comment about this blog being "quiet" for some time, but was at the first page - silly me.
Now, from my side, (44 male, 125 kg, 185cm) living in a city where there are dozens of beaches does not make it easier on being fat.
Body fat here is considered as something from a sci-fi movie, not considered as normal and whoever carries it along, is for sure a slob.
Anyway, will follow it up here and best to all!


I'm 25 female 5'9 286 pounds sometimes it hurts to where I don't like living....I do so bad want to go to a fat camp for adults but cant afford it and dont know what to do..any suggestions....I believe it would also do me good to meet people as my mom passed 5 yrs ago and today is her birthday she was the world to me....:(


Seems like this blog has been "quiet" for about 2.5 years.
Does anyone still come by once in a while?


well i know being fat is something TERRIBLE. i've never been skinny! since the day i was born i weight 8 pounds. im still very young but i've tried a lot of things for loosing weight but it doesnt help. i thought something was wrong with my body, maybe i was sick. but i dont have anything wrong... i talk with my parents about this surgery "Gastric Band" and in a few weeks i'll be taking it! im so exited i think this will finally work! why dont you investigate about it. maybe it will help you too!


Get on a fucking tredmill...and Stop Bitching


I'm a fatty face.

Kayleigh Dorey

i feel the same way Andcatpom if you want to chat i need to vent to so ill be on here alot hopefully :D

Kayleigh Dorey

just london,united kingdom its the first one :D

Kayleigh Dorey

im 14 and overweight and i hate it all of my friends are like size 6-10(UK sizes) and im the biggest one in the group with the UK size of 16. iv tried everything to loose the weight but it just wont come off and iv been looking at fat burning pills and most of them you have to 16+ but theyre huge and i cant swallow them so i cant use them either its so frustriaghting i just want to be normal size and i dont feel like i can talk to my friends about it or my family so i usually just sit by myself and get angry at myself then cry because im so angry.
i really want to loose the weight before my fifteenth birthday in December but i really dont feel like its going to happen.
sometimes i just write what i feel and afew months ago i wrote that i really wished i was dead and my mum found it and she was devastated that i wrote that and that i hated myself but i couldnt i was having friend problems at the time with another set of skinny friends and it wasnt making me problem any better.
im alot like Cha from above except i dont do drugs or self harm in any way but i feel exactly the same. i just really need someone to talk to other than family and friends i even tried looking up talk to to people about loosing weight but nothing came up, well i guess thats just life. :(

also if any one has face and would like to chat about life etc i have facebook and msn.
kayleigh dorey south east london
[email protected]


Well I guess it's nice to know that other people feel like shit about being fat but it doesn't change the fact that I'm only 15 and I weigh 232 pounds,, because of this I haven't had any type of relationship and what's worse is thative become so self conscience that I'm losing my only friends..
I hate standing infront of the mirror with or without clothes because all I see are the rolls of fat seeping out of my gut and my arms that look like body builder arms because they're so big..
I have stretchmarks everywhere,, I basically look pregnant and it's extremely depressing..
I don't feel like going on anymore,, I feel like I've dealt with this pain for too long..
I don't know if anyone's gonna read this but I just needed to vent..


Hey all,

no one needs to be self-haters, this will make you obsessed and even heavier. I am a large lesbian woman, and at one time was almost 500 lbs.

I found a great social group that helped me a lot. (not a diet)
the straight version of which is naafa --
(through naafa you can find sub groups).
naafa has social groups/meetings and Conferences all over the USa.
Conference is like a 3 or 4 day paradise.
you all need to go to naafa Conferences and have a great time.
imagine a world where the majority is fat and your weight is irrelevant. where it is all about what you think, say, wear, who you are.
imagine dances, workshops and pool parties where your weight isn't considered, etc.

i'm not saying diet, i'm not saying don't diet- i'm saying LIVE, live now! you deserve joy :)

ps fyi:
don't do the national/ biggest gatherings at first since they can be meat markets (unless that's your thing). go with a friend if you can and girls don't give it up to the skinny guys right there in the hotel (unless it's something you planned to do beforehand). you can have fun but bring along a little set of expectations before you go so you have no regrets. i have personally never had any problems, but i also wasn't looking for men, however i saw that women inexperienced at getting sexual attention should be prepared so they don't do something stupid.
other than those small things it can be really liberating, which is good for the soul.

Paula Kooren

I have inched up to 180 lbs and am a short lady so I look awful. I keep remembering what I used to look like and then get a glimpse of me in the mirror. Horrors. Besides being fat I have mental issues and my family hardly pays me any attention. I am starting a water fast but do not know if it will work because of all the medication I need to take. Any way I am trying now to overcome constant eating habits. Yuck.


Well I too have suffered from this thing called obisety. I'm 25 and weigh 289 lbs. everytime someone hears my age they think I'm lying and trying to take off a few years. Well my story is I have been fat for a long time. I was thin for a year about 8 years ago. But I feel into a slump and gained it all back and then some. well to finish my tragic story. I have no friends not even one. I have never been kissed or loved by a guy in my life. When I saw the movie never been kissed and I heard comments at school. I guess people don't know that there are people like that out there..... well I want to think I'm not the only one. I just wish I would be able to find some reason for living. I'm just tired off all the diets and diet pills. Will there ever be HOPE?


I understand the soul wrenching pain of being a fatty. Last year I was 175 then the weight slowly crept up. Now, I weight 215 and I sooo fukin depressed. I have done the water diet, green tea diet pills, starving, etc. As we all know its temporary weight loss and for the most part it didnt work for me. Unlike one of the previous bloggers, my boyfriend does hate me being this big. After we eat he pinches some of my stomach and laughs and calls me "fatty" or "biggie" It only makes my own self hate grow stronger. While he might jus be playing, it really does hurt me. I feel like he's ashamed of me when we're out in public not to mention I'm even ashamed of me so its hard to blame him if he is indeed ashamed. I do feel like I would be better off dead. At least my bf will have the beautiful thin woman he deserves since I've shown over and over I can't be what he truly wants. Don't get me wrong I'm not trying to lose weight for him but also for myself. Being this big makes me so antisocial. I hate being around people because I'm so uncomfortable in my own skin and it feels as if everyone can notice it. Maybe its jus my own delusional thinking but its like Im in a fat suit I can't take off. Being fat is like a never ending sick cycle. It starts off with wanting to lose so much weight. You're so motivated until you get tired, don't see results that fast, or find the smell of delicious food unresistable. Once U eat you feel guilty as all hell and promise yourself to start the diet over again tomorrow. Only to fail all over again. At least thats how it is for me-_- God where the hell is my will power?! Did I ever have it? The more I want to lose it seems like the more I gain. It feels as if my body is working against me constantly. I'm so happy I found this site. I guess Im really in the need for some deep soul searching as well as motivation. I feel like all around total loser. I would love to jus have a friend who has the same problem as me and we can help eachother get through this. Thank U for making this blog and to everyone that posted their story of being fat and letting me know Im not alone.

kathy somers walsh

I just made a group if anyone is interested in joining it with me to help me lose weight. I am pooped, I can't do it again...and I have to cause I am 30 pds over weight and I feel terrible. So I made a Google Group for people who want to try to lose weight, share their success and failure stories, help each other out or something, I don't know but Good Lord this being over weight is making my life and my brain miserable...


I hate the feeling of fatness. Being fat feels so wrong because it is the definition of gluttony. Too of a good thing (like food) is a bad thing. We are all living in this society that not only ridicules fat people (this is the easy one), but also surrounds us with a surplus of greasy fat foods. Every street we drive down, there is a fast food restaurant. Fast food is not real food, so why are there so many restaurants? Most of the aisles in the grocery store are filled with Twinkies, candies, and cookies. The fruit stand section is smaller than the chips aisles!! What i am getting to is that these foods are not normal. Its not normal to fry a food in refined, re-used oil and sell it to somebody. It is not natural to eat a synthetic cake filled with cream. However, our world is filled with these pathetic excuses for food and what else are we to think? There is so much junk food out there, we are tricked into thinking that its normal. Then we get fat. And depressed... and the list goes on and on. We become victims of a neverending vicious cycle. What we need to do to end this is flip that switch. Understand that our bodies were created to receive fuel in natural forms, like meats and fruits. It is our duty to pass the McDonalds and Taco Bells, because they are not there to feed us; they are there to kill us with their ingredients. The fast food chains don't care if they make you fat and die sooner. So protect yourself. Take care of yourself is all.


I'm am 20 years old and i kind of just stumbled on to this site and let me just say WOW.... I want everyone to know no MATTER what your size you need to LOVE yourself... Trust me i know its hard i'm 240 pounds and i use ot weigh 260... Thats my progress in a year... But now i am trieng something new, a healther life style, i motivate myself to do something about it... I don't care about the name calling cuz ill beat em up and they know it... I walk for 30 min everyday at a fast pase and i work out in my ghetto fied gym, were i use water bottles, chairs and stairs to work out... And music, dance even if your goofy dancen your still burning fat..... SO no more excuses for me i have it all planed out and hopefully it works out.....and hopefully for everybody else as well.....but please love yourself!!!!! It took me years just to like the person that i am, and i have moments but i remind myself who i am and what i stand for

I'm a fatty too.....


hi everyone i hate being fat im 22 year old i was skinny back in high school until i started gettin depressed so i ate everything im 5'3 and i weigh 253 and i hat it sometime i feel like killin myself can im a black woman and some black dont like black women. i work out everyday now and i eat is cracker and drink bottle water everyday thats it i want to get down to 140 pound by next year summer. i want my stomah flat again.


Hi I'm Sarah. I am 26 187lbs. I love me.. That is most important! Please remember YOU HAVE TO EAT!!! That is the key to weight loss. Last year I was 210lbs. I get up at 6am.. Eat some oatmeal. or eggs heck i had a sandwich for breakfast this morning. Just one though!! and don't forget the lettuce and tomato ;D . I walk my kids to school (about 2 miles there and back) then I come home around 8am and have a snack, pop corn, yogurt, fruit. things like that with my sugar free koolaid. then lunch around 12pm.. Just enough to satisfy not stuff. then I walk to go get my kids home (another 2 miles). After school snacks now.. I have 4 cookies. or a small brownie some thing to make my sweet tooth happy :). I eat dinner between 5pm and 6:45pm and I will indulge in a glass of sweet tea or pepsi. Then I stop... no more.. I sit on my butt in front of the computer and play on the internet till bed time.. this is hard. this is the time I want to get up and rummage through my fridge.. It's the hardest time to stop my self and say no.. I get up I take a shower. I step outside and look at the sky. I drink some sugar free koolaid :D... but if I just really really have to have something I have to make it fruit or a few bites of yogurt (never a whole one). I know it's hard but i had no choice. My 6yo started to follow my habits and he gained 20lbs in 2 weeks.. I was frantic. So we stoped driving as much. Started walking more eating better things and less of them ( must remember portions!!!) I'm not losing a ton of weight but I am losing a pound here and there. I'm still eating good food I like.. I still go out to restaurants just I stop when I'm full.. I take it home and it makes a nice lunch the next day. Sorry to rant I just really want people to know that starvation wont help you it will only hurt you. I've never seen any of you but because you can pour your hearts out like this and be honest about your feelings that in its self makes me think of all of you as beautiful wonderful people.. Don't give up hope. Don't hate yourself. take it one day at a time and if you fall of the wagon, climb right back on!!!don't let one day of weakness ruin anything you work hard for.. Keep at it ladies and I will to!


I'm going to the diet doctor to get some diet pills,,, that always works... it's just a pain to maintain the weight after you lose it.


I am sending love to all of you! (And some to myself, too!) More of my story when I come back next...

Anonymous Helper

i know i'm in no position to say anything but i'd like to inform you there are always people who love you, in this day and age there are people called FA's also known as 'chubby chasers' they love big girls/boys so remember there are alway people who'll like you.

fatty MCfaterton

What do i hate the most about being fat? The way my body looks like dough on a hook? or how my chins gently sway in the wind? Or how my flesh cascades over my jeans? None of that we are all old and grey eventually. Its the constant isolation and rejection from conceited assholes who think you don't care your hideous troll.
Well here i am world, just because my heart in covered in too much fat does not mean it does not bleed or love.
Im 21, its a young age but i know cruelty that will haunt me.

There is a river so black in my heart, that I would follow, if I could only find the end. or an answer. When I was young i would eat eat eat to fill the void. and then well 450 pounds later, somethings not right... and then I tried god and well, i don't have faith to move mountains let alone a pebble.

I used to be so angry and so ugly, and now i feel so goddamn mediocre. I tell myself I'll do it tomorrow, i won't binge honest.

guess who frying in hell for lying?


HI! I am so glad that I came upon this site! I am 5'0 and 172 pounds! I have resorted to binging and purging. I feel that it's the only way! I have 3 children, the youngest is 9 mths. I am raising them as a sinle parent, so it's difficult to get a workout in during the day. I usually end up eating whatever they left over from their meals through out the day! I really do hate myself at this point! Help!


Ya I feel all that you all feel. I was one of those 17% body fat and fit girls, played sports and worked out all the time. I actually liked who I was and know now that I was very happy, then. For six years now, after getting pregnant and putting on over 200Lbs have carried the burden that I never thought I would carry. No one looks at me notices me or even gives a damn if I'm here. I used to get lots of attention even though I wasnt stuck up at the time back then now I'm just an invisible blob. I would've never thought I would end up this way and never understood until now that fat people get treated way different and judged at every corner thanks alot world.


I have been fat for over 7 years and I hate it! I have never been this large in my life. The largest for a long period of time before this was 150 pounds and I thought that was bad. Boy, what I didn't know. I started this new year at my largest weight of 238 pounds and I am 5'1". I can't stand myself anymore. It is affecting my whole life. I can't look at myself in the mirror, I hate going shopping, I hate getting together with my skinny friends, I feel like everyone is looking at me saying, wow, is she ever fat. I am self conscious when I eat out, again like everyone is watching and saying, well no wonder she's so fat, look at her eat. So, two and a half weeks ago I started with an organization to help me lose weight. So far, I have lost 13 pounds, but have so much more to go. Thank you ladies, for all your posts. It tells me that I am not alone.


i totally understand the way your feeling, i feel the same way embaressed at the way clothes look on me, averting my eyes when i get out of the shower, i really would do anything to be skinny, it almost seems like it would make everything in my life good even that's probably not true, it would be something that's right at least. It feels like i can't talk to my friends about it because if i complain they feel awkward and just have to say i'm not fat. ARRGGGHH if only hey.


WOW! Another year has begun and still the first thing on my mind when I wake up is "I hate my fat self" those are my first and last words of everyday and many times inbetween. Every year I get fatter,sometimes I get motivated and lose 5 pounds but it comes back with a vengence with 5 more of its friends. I hate feeling like I don't even care if I wake up in the morning because I hate myself so much. I know I have many things to be thankful for in my life, but they are all shadowed by my self lothing. Why can't I just get on a plan and stay there? I wish I knew. It was nice to find this blog which puts into words how I am feeling. Misery does like company. FatGranny

sad and lonely

i really cant stand the way i look why was i cursed wih this horrible body while all my friends can wear what they want eat what they want go with whoever they want and the most important shop were they want why me i just hate the way i look and i just wish i would have been born with another body and a pretier face


i really dont know what to do. i am 18, 5'7 and 290lbs or somewhere near that. of course i am gaining weight becuase i am 19 weeks pregnant. but all my life i have been fat. im surprised i even know my name. i have been called so many different things i could be fat ass, fatso, fatty mcfattalot for all anyone cares. i never really even had a boyfriend except one guy i really liked, but he did bad things to me and i will never get over it. i over eat and i cannot help it. i dont know how to stop eating. i want to know what its like to be skinny and pretty. i wanna know what its like to wear a swimsuit in public without worrying about my jigglies. even worse i barely have boobs so im basically a boy. i cant even wear most fat girl clothes becuase the boob things are to big so i look even stupid. i cant find maternity clothes anywhere near what i need. i hate my life. if it wasnt for my fiance who i know loves me and thinks i am beautiful and my baby to come, i would definitely have killed myself. i came relly close a few times. i guess the only thing left is to starve myself once i have the baby. maybe if im pretty i wont get hurt by mean men that think im ugly and lonely and vulnerable. maybe they wont do anything bad to me anymore. i cant take it when it happens. omg i hate myself so much i wanna be able to look in the mirror without freaking out or looking away. i hope here is one place i can talk about it and not get made fun of. why cant people just be nice to me. i do like one thing though, kinda, my face is kinda pretty with makeup of course, but its something.


Wow, just found your site and i don't feel so alone. I hate my body, the way it looks the way it makes me feel. If i could chop off the jelly belly i would. I lovced being pregnant, did not gain a pound until i had him then instanly gained like 20-30 pounds in one night (no kidding) been trying to lose it for about two years now but with no luck actually found that eating healthy makes me gain weird huh, would lovwe another baby, but too scared to because of my weight (i am now 16st (220lbs)) i HATE MYSELF SO MUCH


I know exactly how you feel. Im still in school and i don't even feel like a person. People are always talking about how fat i am even when im sitting right next to them. Whenever I walk past someone i can feel them looking at me and laughing. I always cry and lock myself in the bathroom during lunch cause i hate eating around people and no i don't eat in the bathroom that's just discusting. A lot of people are probably thinking " stupid fat kid just stop eating" but the thing is i have. I've brought my diet down to 500 calories a day for a 2 weeks now and i only lost 2 bls :( I tried everydiet i could think of from South beach to Weight watchers. I really hate being fat and I'm severly depressed. I was on depression pills but my mom doesn't want to get them for me because they're too expensive, but i guess that's a good thing because i shouldn't be happy while im still fat. I might as well die to stop my sufferring. I hate it when people try to talk you out of commiting suicide. I mean if someone doesn't want to live that's their decision. Whjat's the point of making them suffer longer.



I can't believe this, scrap my correction above, what I mean to write was:

"Anyway, I am not overweight anymore and I am NOW 145 lbs and a size 10/12."

Hahaa oops.


sorry for the horrible spelling and grammar in my previous post! Just noticed it now!

Anyway, I did not mean to write "I am NOT 145 lbs and a size 10/12", I meant to write "Anyway, I am NOW overweight anymore and I am not 145 lbs and a size 10/12."


Helloooo everyone!
I must admit that I stumbled upon this blog by accident, but I must say it's very very sad to read about everyone's feelings of self-loathing and low-self esteem etc.

I remember being 190 lbs at 5 foot 7 and miserable. I had been overweight since I was about 7 (I was obese at some point too), and at 14 I was a uk size 18/20 (I don't know what that is in American sizes)and I hated myself- people used to say horrible things all the time and my weight prevented me from doing certain things that I wanted to do. Basically, I felt pretty much the same as a lot of posters here to- and that's why reading all this actually much made me cry a bit!!!!

Anyway, I am not overweight anymore and I am not 145 lbs and a size 10/12. I know I am by no means skinny but I feel far healthier now!!! I hate it when people go around flaunting their weight loss, but I just want you all to know that I felt pretty much the same as you do now- depressed, desperate and yet still unable to get myself out of the mess- but in the end there was a way out!

I bet that so many people have told you this before, but if you have a problem in your life, as cliche as this is: ONLY YOU CAN FIX IT, JUST KEEP STRONG! You are beuatiful human beings (cheesey but true ;) ) and you deserve to be your best- and if being healthier and more in control of your weight helps you to be your best, then go for it!

I am aware that this is easier said than done, and that some people here feel so depressed and inadequate that they see no point. If this is the case, or even if it isn't, and you want someone to chat to or to listen to you or to give you motivation and advice (not that I'm saying it will be perfect advice, of course!! but helpful advice at the least!!) then please speak to me via msn or email: [email protected]

NO HUMAN BEING SHOULD FEEL INADEQUATE, AND NO-ONE SHOULD FORGET THAT THEY ARE BEUATIFUL! even if you don't see it-----okay this post is cheesey to the max but still true all the same!


when i was younger i used to binge eat heaps. through out my teen years i developed bulimia as a means of desperately trying to keep my weight down and after i could no longer bare the vicious cycle of binging and purging, i became anorexic and stayed that way for two years. i am now overweight (i consider myself to be morbidly obese of course!)but i am receiving treatment for binge eating disorder (or compulsive over-eating disorder) at an outpatient facility called The Oak House in melbourne. its extremely worthwhile... i just thought i should let you aussie girls/guys know that there is some help out there for compulsive overeaters. take care and stay strong

can't stand being fat

i'm only 15 and i weight 330 and it sucks!! escpecially since people in high school are so mean i wish i could just be skinny it would make everything better


I hate being fat! im sick of it! no matter how hard i try i just cant lose weight! everyday i wake up and think that today im not going to eat anything fatning and by the end of the day im eating whateveri can find! and then after that i fall into serious depresssion. Im the only fat person in my family, my sisters are stick thin! i look like a fat sore thumb comapred to them :( wish i was thin....its so hard


First of all--Sandysue, you may be right in some cases but certainly not all. If you don't like complaining, why even read this blog?? I'm sure there are better things for you to do than read this blog if you don't enjoy it.

I'm 25 years old and weigh 200 pounds. I was stick-thin until middle school--in middle school, I grew to 5'4" and 140 pounds (I'd *hardly* call that fat now). All through middle school and high school I maintained that weight. It wasn't until I got married that I began to gain more weight. In my first year of marriage, I gained 40 pounds. I started going to the gym and working out for an hour to an hour and a half 3-4 times a week. I lost 20 lbs in two months. Then I got divorced. I met someone a year later and gained the 20 lbs back, plus another 20. (All that darn eating out). In my current situation, I drive 4.5 hours a day (back and forth to work--thankfully only a temporary thing) and sit at a desk for 8. I sleep for 7. So that leaves me 30 min to get ready for work, an hour of lunch at work and then 3 hours at home to clean, cook, work outside and do whatever else needs to be done. I can't wait until I have more time, so I can go back to the gym.
I hate being fat--but I also recognize that I'm the only one who can change that. I try not to worry what other people think and focus more on why I need to change. Sure, it would be nice to fit into smaller sizes again but more importantly, I only have one body, one life. I need to do whatever I can to care for it properly!
I've read a lot of posts on here. I hope that everyone who has posted on here is finding ways to deal with their individual situations, whether that is changing your diet/exercise or improving your self-esteem or any other number of solutions. Good luck to us all!


What on earth good does it do to come here and whine? Complainers without solutions are boring and tedious. Take responsibility. Be accountable. Quit watching TV and go for a walk. Quit buying Twinkies and potato chips, then you won't eat them. Drink more water. There are a million little things to change your lifestyle, one bit at a time. You just have to decide that you don't want to use your weight as an excuse for what you're not doing with your life.


I have been fat all of my life and it has realy damaged my social life i am too scared to meet new people and i still feel embarresed around my oldest friends i am only 16 and i weigh 17 stone around 220 pounds i think. AHHHHHH i feel as if i will always be fat which makes me hate myself because i don't know what it is like to be a normal weight i can't control myself i just don't know what to do!!!!!!!!!!!!


hey there im 17 and i hate my body my thighs allways rub together when i walk like im going to start a forest fire! i use to be thin really thin everyone would allways say carle you can eat anything you want and still stay skin and bones but then in 8th grade i just started becoming lazy and eating everything in sight food became very importent in my life when before it didnt matter to me in the leasti am in highschool and i ve only had 2 boyfriends in my life i feel hideous i wish i wasent such a fatass i am nowa size 17 i want to dress in pretty girly things like all the girls at my skool but i am too fat so i wear band t shirts and jeans


Six Foot right on the dot. And yeah I've always been a big kid and so has my dad.. And I know that's the truth of the matter but I want to love myself for me too and at the moment I don't and that's a problem.. It's not like.. "I don't accept myself" Because I do.. It's just.. In the bottom of my heart I know I can look/do/feel better.. but no matter how much effort I keep pumping in I just don't get the results I want... I don't know...


I haven't been around much on the blog, and I apologize for that.

For the obese and chronically over-weight, there is more to it than exercise and diet. Sure, yes, do those two things and you will lose fat probably. But that is like telling an alcoholic, "it's simple, just cut back on your booze". It doesn't work very often because its an addiction, a symptom of some other disease.

Add to that the skewed view we have of what a body needs to look like to be accepted, and it is a recipe for disaster.

Derek, how tall are you? Maybe you are just a big kid, and you need to accept yourself in that way. Keep working out, make gradual, healthier changes to your diet, and let your body decide where it needs to be. People will like you for who you really are, not who you think they want you to be.


Anon... 8th grade I was 200lb's... I went in Freshman year.. Played football.. And kicked ass.. Lost 50 and was down to 150.. Then I joined the swimteam... And so on so forth.. This year, I'm a senior... And I'm back at 240.... None of it's muscle... I eat pretty healthy... And I Exercize for 2 hours everymorning at the gym... I run/swim/bike and lift weights.. vigorusly... I don't want sympothy.. I wan't fucking out... I want people to see all the work I put into it... I want to be the stud at the pool partys and girls know I'm not a prick... I want to be able to wear a medium again... Havn't since like gradeschool...


Its' simple, for all you people leaving comments. You don't go on a diet, that is lame. Eat healthy, don't count calories and actually exercise. Its easier to hate yourself than physically do something. I used to be fat and lost over 70lbs. So I feel no sympathy if you don't go exercise 30 minutes every other day and eat vegtables, fish, fruit, and whole grains.

I used to hate myself, and sometime I still strive for perfection and get down on myself because I can't see all the muscles in my body yet.


Hey there, my names Derek... I'm a 17 year old male and I weight in about 225... And I just don't know what to do anymore... I use to play football, and run cross country, and was on the varsity swim team, and even played boys volleyball... My dad's been overweight ever since I can remember and me and him even ran a triathlon together... So I can do all these things and was okay at them... And wasn't drained by it.. But I've always had stretch marks.. And been huge... And I sweat 24/7.. All over, all the time... And I can't take it anymore and I don't know what to do.. I go to the gym I run, I bike, I swim, I lift, I watch what I eat, I only drink water... And to top it off I have a beautiful girlfriend and I wan't to look good for her too... I just don't know what to do anymore.. Please help..


yeah i hate being fat too... i actually have no idea how i got fat really seems like overnight all my life ive been playing every sport i could everyday. But the main thing i hate about being fat is the sweating, i dont do anything anymore i never go out to the store the mall i dont even have a job because of how much i sweat it really sucks bad.


Being Fat is the worst thing ever in my books!

Im 20 years old and i am FAT FAT FAT! I am a size 16 and its just keeps going up! i used to be thin and pretty! i have gone froma size 10-12 to a 16 and rising (australian size).

I have a loving boyfriend and a Great Life but i cant stop eating, I am extreemly unhappy and i wouldnt mind if i just died! Dropped dead today and it would make everything better, i wouldnt have to look at my fat body or deal with getting clothes that dont fit because they are mostly too small or to Big.

There is so much meida saying that we have to look a certain way and people say its wrong!! Y is it wrong to be thin and Healthy! People dont just get fat! Its because of Many different issues weather it be physical, Mental or you just plain Wrong diet and LAZY!! Everybody wishes that there is some miracle Cure BUT guess WHAT there isnt! Being skinny is great, i would ba if i could but i cant!

Too all thoes people out there are FAT and no matter what you have tried the WEIGHT does not move for than 2kg!!! IT suxs we try so hard and no results!



I came here today feeling heavy with emotion. The feeling of being overweight is simply unbearable, as I have deduced on my own, and sometimes I just can't help but hate myself. It affects every one of us, every day, constantly nudging up to bite us in the asses. I can't take pictures of myself, and on my dearest of memories, I have pictures of eevryone else but myself. I look down or other ways when I'm in a mirror, or simply passing a glass door. My reflection is my enemy, and it is slowly killing me inside. I cringe in disgust at what I see in pictures. When I look at my face alone, I figure that I could be a pretty girl if I had the body for it, but to no avail will I ever really attain my dream. I have always been the "fat kid," and I'm fairly sure that the title will never be redeemed. If I ever become thin, will I be truly happy with myself? Will I stop seeing double chins in my pictures, will I stop hurtning myself? It's hard to think of a life when I'm happy with my body; but then again, who is? Thin poeple have never felt this pain, though; this unmistakable merciless pain inside of our hearts; the pain of having your parents call you fat or put you on diets; the pain of never having a boyfriend; and all of this pain turns into hatred because it hides our shame and our tears. See me now, as I am, and that is who I'll be branded as for the rest of my life. I feel you suffering, friends, and I believe it is time for this hatred and pain to end. I'd like to think that if we wait long enough, we will find our solutions in our own way, but the reality is that we have to make initiative. I'm tired of being fat; are you?


Well, it happened AGAIN. Met a blind date for the first time -- and the two weeks of e-mails and conversation (daily)went pffft -- everything changed when he saw me. No more hour-long phone calls, no plans to get together, no interesting notes back and forth. I made sure to send recent and accurate photos of myself, precisely so I could avoid that horrid moment when the look of dissapointment crosses his face. And here I am, hating my body and hating the hopeful peeks at my e-mail, still wanting that "You've Got Mail" moment.

Sigh. I'm the fat girl. Again.


I know how you all feel. I was always the fat girl with hardly any friends, and was never asked out!. At 18 (19 now)i was at my highest... 209 lbs!! i was like "OMG this is not acceptable anymore, i look terrible, UGLY, and clothes look like crap on me" lol. i also never wanted to be out in public because of the way i looked, it was so depressing. well i started dieting and exercising my ass off and have lost 78 lbs, im down to 131 now and i plan on losing more, i feel great =] All i can say is dont give up. Think of it as a life and death situation, if you keep getting bigger you will die, so think of those who love you and that you love and need to be around for and that should be plenty motivation to stick with your diet! good luck everybody


I find a bit of this hilarious, anyways I'm 16 and weight about over 300lbs. Hell, I don't even hate myself like the people above do. lol. Anyways I don't diet but I eat about once or less a day normally.

Respect To You

What can i say after hours and hours of sifting through site after site i come across one that actually makes sense and says it as it is without any fluffy bullshit. Topmarks to you for being so open and frank its good to hear someone else say how you feel. Change can be made but it takes untold strength willpower and determination, i havent found it myself yet but i do know that if i ever stop trying to find it then there will never be any hope so some hope is better than no hope just got to keep trying my man! Respect to you for your honesty! Its Real!


Cha - you need to get over yourself. The MAJORITY of our population is overweight. And they don't do drugs or want to hurt themselves. Don't you realize that your attitude and drug use will only deplete your already withering self-esteen thereby causing you to gain more weight?

You need an attitude adjustment. And maybe then you will be able to tackle your weight loss attempts a bit better.

As for why I think I have the right to say this - I think I know better than anybody here how much it sucks to be fat! Why do I claim such an honor? Well you see, up until a few years ago, I had it all. I was really thin, very good-looking, and very popular. And then, because of a personality change that made me start thinking and acting exactly like CHA, I started to pack on the pounds.

I kne how good it felt to be healthy and attractive. It makes carrying my fat ass around all that much more horrible for me.


I just did the same thing from google and this popped up.
I am 17 and weigh 195. I am SO sick of the way I look. I am SO sick of trying, right now I am exercising and eating less.. and guess what!? NO DIFFERENCE!!!!!
i am not loosing anything, I hate myself. I hate my self so badly. My best friend weighs like 108 and can literally eat 2000 calories every day for a week straight and not gain a pound. I effing eat like bread and the scale goes up. I use to make myself throw up, i still do. depends on how guilty and sad i am. I do try and stop eating, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt. I just don't know what to do anymore.
Like I feel like I will never be happy with myself until I am thin. I hate my whole body, even my face. I never take a compliment from everyone, I just feel like they are giving me pity.
I pray that by the end of summer I will ATLEAST be down to 175. and that is a lot of weight. but I guess I just need a goal, you know?
I hate everything about myself.
Last year i even covered my whole mirror in papers so I wouldn't have to look at myself.
I don't even know anymore=[
sad sad sad sad


stop hating yourself, it's a crutch!


hey... being fat is awesome...idk wat ur talkin about. I have lots of friends and have had 7 boyfriends already.


heyy... i like being fat but am scared that i'll never get a boyfriend. I love everything about my rolls and i love my love handles. i am 13 and weigh 206 pounds but my mom is not fat at all and neither is my sister. they support me alot and i do have friends. sometimes i wish i could fit into the cute clothes that everyone gets from abercrombie ( a&f doesn't even fit me). I've always been fat since i was 3. Every year i would gain about 20 pounds, but now i gain about 30-40 pounds a year. i like being fat but sometimes i wish people wouldn't judge me before they get to know me. if anyone else has similar feelings.. please add to this website...


i hate being fat. I am 13 and weigh 206 pounds!I have friends but we r the loser group at school. I will never have a boyfriend and i hate never fitting into any "cool" clothes. I like myself but not my body. I have stretch marks all over my thighs and can barely squeeze into the desks at school. People are nice to me byt i just don't feel comfortable. I wish i could lose at least 15 pounds.

grace kelly

Im 16 and i have a formal coming up and i hate being this fat??? wat do i do


Well, I am 28 years old 5'3" and weigh 198 lbs. I have always struggled with my weight. Usually I would weigh in at 160 lbs. though. My heaviest weight was app.240 lbs and that was awful!! I got down to 135 lbs (size 6!!!) 2 years ago.I am starting to feel that awful feeling again, as I have been working out for 10 weeks. I walk 4 miles a day 6 days a week (medium paced) I even do intervals of jogging...! I have only lost 2 lbs and have been eating pretty good. It sounds weird but I love my inner self but hate me on the outside! I just want to be comfortable. I am not asking to weigh 120!! Why is this sooo... hard!!


Its easy. Its called a "fuckin joke". Come on tell me that this so called "asshole"..called by society by the name of God doesn't play "favortism"?. Oh..oh.."your probably thinking".."my golly gosh..she sounds so "darn" angry!. Fuck Yeah!!! I've got these bitches who up-chuck every meal so they can obtain their size "0 to 2" bodies. I've dealt with asshole men who love the fact that they are pucking their fucking guts out "just for them". Its a "pathetic" joke (I wanna laugh, but then wanna "puke" myself) when these so "called".."wonderful" "kind" "coworkers"..who claim they are your "friends" grab the quarter inch of fat on their gut and then cry into the mirror..."ohhhh".."i'm soooo fat!!" I'm just sick of the "whole thing" now. I've done the fuckin "Weight Watchers", I've done EVERYTHING!!..even ..Yes even "Bypass"..(asshole!). I got down to 109 pounds. Ya know those big ole black giant garbage bags they have? Ya know those ones that you "usually" put all your "leaves n dogshit" in? "Imagine" tieing one of those fuckers on to your waist. But before you do, fill in half way with water. Thats the "enjoyment", I "felt" after Bypass. It was "hell"!! I couldn't figure out what was worse..being fat or being 109 pounds but my skin/body looking like it was 109 years old. I'm "sick n tired" of "this "so-called" life. I'm sick n tired of trying "over n over" again, trying to "prove" to these "asshole" employers..who could "give a shit"..if I was (within any minute) to drop dead. They're too busy gettin a "hard on" watchin some "dumb-ass" "pathetic-beyond stupid" "little bitch" who's a size 0, with a friggin pencil stuck in her fuckin ear whimpering.."oh.oh..oh..I duz jus dan't knows wuz wong wit me..i's..ohhh "wittle ole me"..jus..jus..(whimpering some more).."can't figure out dis "big oleee com..puterrr"...I'm just "done" am 'officially" through!!!!!


Latisha, there is only one way to lose weight: eat less and exercise more.

But you already know that right? My experience is that being fat is a choice, and food can be an addiction to fill some other needs in our lives. It doesn't matter what kind of diet you go on, none are going to work until you figure out why you are using food to feel better about yourself. That is a journey you have to take on your own, and making your own rules up as you go. Look to make your self more healthy, not less fat.

The best advice I can give you is this; If your friends are making fun of you because you are fat, find knew friends because those suck.

Have a good weekend and good luck on your journey for better health.


my friends not fat but i am! cause im 5'2" and i weigh 175 please help!!!

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