One of the things I continually do wrong is let events have too much control over my self control (or lack of it). If there is a party or a dinner party to attend, I put off dieting, if there is a holiday, I say "why bother". Sometimes relatives come to visit, like my cousin recently, and I use it as an excuse to go off the deep end. They want to go out to dinner or do something that centers around food and I figure, well, if I can't count it, then I guess I have to just forget about maintaining any control at all.
All that would not be so bad, but it is the aftermath that lingers that does real damage. The "event" might last only a day, or even for one meal, but for some reason I throw up my hands as surrendering to forces too powerful! Because I gave up control on the "diet", then I have to recalculate everything, start all over again.
I think I see this weight loss thing as a "program" or a "test" of my will. As if God himself (herself) is putting this obstacle in front of me, presenting a challenge that I am supposed to overcome, or be overcome by. I view it then as more of a journey, like Frodo, carrying a big 50 pound bag of flab up to Mt. Doom. I want to throw myself into the fiery pit, let it burn away my excesses, my sins. It is a definite journey, with a beginning and an ending, there are no pauses, stops, do-overs in-between just because someone is coming to visit!
Is this further evidence of being a perfectionist? Or maybe a narcissist? or perhaps living in a realm yet uncharted by my self help books, like deep seated delusions of grandeur? Maybe I am just nuts and in need of some serious medication (beyond potato chips). One thing is for sure, I have even more to think about on the road to Mt. Doom.
You can ramble here anytime, I find it comforting.
Posted by: FB | May 24, 2005 at 07:02
Well. I don't need any reason to drink or not drink. Basically, I want to drink all the time. So of course there's always some reason, event, problem or celebration that warrants a hiatus from my on the wagon status. ALWAYS.
Today is Victoria Day. Let's get drunk! Tomorrow is the day AFTER Victoria Day. Whoo hoo, let's get drunk!
Food is like that with you, I think. Maybe, or I could be all off the scale.
Scale. Teehee.
I'll join you in the diet. And don't make a comment about how I don't need it. Did you know EVERYONE, fat skinny, tall short, muscular weeny...we all hate something about ourselves. And I do mean HATE. Look in the mirror and want to cut the offending body part OFF. For me, that would be my butt cheeks hanging down to my knees. It's where all my fat goes to party.
I don't know why I always come to your blog and ramble. Something about you really affects me strongly. I guess I can relate.
Posted by: Faith | May 23, 2005 at 18:42
When you fall off, get back on.
How can I get to the gym? It is the worst thing in the world. I hate it. When I get there, I do fine, but it is the getting there that just hurts me so.
Hey, I am sorry I suggested lunch, God, how unthinking of me. I didn't mean to encourage you or me to avoid our diet issues? How about going for a walk together?
Posted by: Jaye Ramsey Sutter | May 23, 2005 at 12:59
We're all nuts. Avoid meds if you can. My answer to eating out is to order appetizers. Since not every place offers grilled chicken or fish, at least you can practice portion control with appetizers. Just don't order the fried cheese! :-)
One of my freinds tells me that the best thing to do is to get right back on the wagon. I've done that too--gone on a binge for one day or whatever, and then figure that I've blown the whole thing to hell. It is a matter of developing a mindset of "One day at a time" and developing new habits, new ways of thinking. It ain't easy, that's for sure! I have a long way to go on this one.
Posted by: Michelle | May 22, 2005 at 12:49
I let myself be distracted from chores by things I really shouldn't be doing. (blogging) Dieting is similiar; there are so many ways to get around it or rationalize not doing it. I wish there were an easy way, but it's just HARD, frustrating work. It's like an extra job. My husband is trying to lose weight for his blood pressure; he is doing pretty well so far except for the Wasabi chips he ate last night. Oops!
Posted by: Margaret | May 22, 2005 at 12:01